Princeton

PU Junior Arrested for Lewd Conduct in Brown Hall Bathroom

Footsy or Entrapment? PRINCETON, NJ — On Saturday Princeton University student Craig Larry, '09, was arrested by Public Safety for signaling his desire for sex with the occupant of the…

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Princeton Defeats Harvard in Animal Abuse Match

In addition to football’s three-point victory over Columbia last week, Princeton managed to eke out another win against arch-rival Harvard…

Dean Jueds Has an Amazing Signature

Dear Dean Jueds, I recently had the pleasure of receiving a letter from you with regards to my Dean’s Warning…

Dean Malkiel Leaves Princeton for Standard & Poor’s

Former Dean of the College Nancy Weiss Malkiel is bringing grade deflation to a whole new organization.

22 Rejected Thesis Titles

Making Melanoma: Titration of the Dose of Zinc-based UV-ray Blocking Products to Produce the Optimal Skin Pigmentation in a Caucasian…

5 Tips On Selling Princeton to Admitted Students

There are only a few days left until the pre-frosh are required to commit to one school or another. Here's…

Old Man Lurer Had Audacity to be Old, Unattractive

It has been two weeks since Tony Kadyhrob was spotted in the Borough of Princeton, but the aftereffects linger. Kadyhrob,…

Fucking WhitmanWire

WhitmanWire has brought to my attention the fact that there are a lot of arts and crafts going on at…

Princeton University Reverses Controversial Policy

After several years of experimentation, Princeton University announced a plan to remove a generally-disliked policy and revert to the original…