Rules of Writing in a Creative Fiction Class
New South stands for tangible possibility, a concrete beacon of unkempt potential standing amidst the collegiate gothic plain of suburban New Jersey.
Alex Judge
Mitt Romney Calls Emergency Meeting of Mitt Romneys
– AJ ’15. Art by CSO ’15.
Failed U-Store Items
ITEM REASON FOR FAILURE Dunce Caps caused death at fraternity ‘head-jousting’ tournament Cereal out-competed by Frosted Flakes Dildos bright orange is a difficult color to hide Skateboards 50% of Forbes students hospitalized Vodka too popular, couldn’t handle demand Toilet…
Tilghman: I Hate Being Called Shirley
Princeton was surprised on Saturday to learn that President Shirley Tilghman, who led the school for twelve years, would be stepping down in June. When asked why she felt that now was the time to retire, Tilghman told The Princeton Tiger, “I just got really sick of everyone calling me Shirley.”
Christmas in September
I suppose Labor Day can also commemorate the state your mother must have been in just before you were, naked, bawling, and weighing one four thousandth of what you weigh now, ejected out of her cavernous and torn vagina, simultaneously marking the last time you will ever come into contact with a vagina and the beginning of your pathetically luxurious life.