Fiction/Poetry

On Having Finals After Break

To having finals after break I'd favor burning at the stake. At least the fire wouldn't take as long as death by Monster shake. At MIT, they may play Quake…

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Lasted Fiction/Poetry

“There Is No God”: One Man’s Quest to Win an Amazon Gift Card by Taking Psych Thesis Surveys

Four years. Four years, I have tried. Four years—four years! four years! I have tried. Four years, I have failed!…

A Valentine’s Day Sex Overload

SEX OVERLOADS. Everybody knows them. Everybody fears them. You’ll be heading to Late Meal or whatever, you know, just out and about and minding your own…

World-Famous Rock Star Chad Kroeger Falls in Love With Amanda, Age 15, by Amanda, Age 15

It was a bright and not-stormy day, and Chad Kroeger sat by himself in the corner booth of Big Horns…

The Lost Manuscripts of Chet Slaterton, 19th Century British Fraternity Brother

Our Mutual Friend ‘Twas the fourteenth of July, a beautiful day with the sky blue as a robin’s egg and nary…

Stopping by McCosh on a Drunken Evening

Whose coat this is I think I know. He must be back in Terrace, though; He did not see me…

Roommate Contract (Amended)

Roommate Contract (Additions in Green) Names: Donald Marad, Neil Stewart By signing this roommate contract, we hereby agree to: Sleep by 2 AM…

Green Eggs and Daaaaaamn

I do not like Green Eggs, but damn...

The Most Sustainable Excerpts from 50 Shades of Green

Right now, the only thing hotter than global warming is this steamy new romp from G.W. Jameson. The novel, printed…