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Princeton Approves Orgy on Cannon Green
Less than a week after Harvard officially recognized Harvard College Munch, a student group devoted to kinky sex, the Ivy League’s kinky sex arms race escalated. Yesterday, Princeton University issued…
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Gary Johnson Carries New Jersey As Democrats, Republicans Stay Home
Election watchers of all political stripes were stunned Tuesday night as long-shot Libertarian candidate Gary Johnson decisively carried New Jersey,…
Intrepid Student Voyages Into Wild Unknown Beyond Charter
Last Saturday night, Brandon Wilson ’16 took a giant leap into Princeton University lore as he walked east on Prospect…
University Raises Sushi Prices Yet Again, Resulting in Mass Student Outrage and Chaos
Not long after lowering sushi prices after student discontent, Princeton University was forced to raise sushi prices yet again.
Following Fresco Fiasco, Copycat ‘Restorers’ Wreak Havoc
Following last month’s tragedy, at least 12 more pieces of classic artwork have fallen victim to contemporary artists. According to…
Tilghman: I Hate Being Called Shirley
Princeton was surprised on Saturday to learn that President Shirley Tilghman, who led the school for twelve years, would be…
Romney Chooses Barack Obama as Running Mate in Appeal to Independents, African-Americans
In a shocking turn of events, a source with intimate knowledge of the decision tells The Princeton Tiger that Mitt…
Decline in Science and Engineering Majors Due to Math Being Hard
This May, colleges across the country have reported a continuing decline in the number of science and engineering majors graduating.…
New Education Bill Bans Anything Bad from Happening to Children
Saying it is in “the best interests of the future leaders and innovators of this country”, the House of Representatives…