Analyzing Global Dynamics and Unraveling Key Policy Initiatives
We are just an advanced breed of monkeys on a minor planet of a very average star. But we can understand the Universe. That makes us something very special.
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Top 10 Ways To Troll This Parent’s Weekend
Yes, be an asshole.
How To Spice Up The Decor In Your Crack House
From the South Atlanta edition of Better Homes & Gardens.
Failed U-Store Items
ITEM REASON FOR FAILURE Dunce Caps caused death at fraternity ‘head-jousting’ tournament Cereal out-competed by Frosted Flakes Dildos bright orange is a difficult color to hide Skateboards 50% of Forbes…
Things Least Likely to be Said During the Presidential Debates
A lot of major points will be raised tonight. Here are exactly none of them.
Following Fresco Fiasco, Copycat ‘Restorers’ Wreak Havoc
Following last month’s tragedy, at least 12 more pieces of classic artwork have fallen victim to contemporary artists. According to investigators, reports of copycat restorations have been coming in around…
Romney Chooses Barack Obama as Running Mate in Appeal to Independents, African-Americans
In a shocking turn of events, a source with intimate knowledge of the decision tells The Princeton Tiger that Mitt Romney has chosen Barack Obama as his Vice Presidential running…
What to Bring to Your Next Potluck Dinner
How to be the high-light of the night.
Romney Surges in Israeli Polls After Visit
Presidential hopeful Mitt Romney’s European tour concluded on a high note Tuesday, as a new Rasmussen poll showed the Republican had opened up a 5-point lead over Democratic incumbent Barack…
10 Places the University Could’ve Put the Extra Freshmen
As many of our readers may know, Princeton University over-enrolled in the freshman class and is scrambling to find places to put all of the extra students. Ever concerned with…
Decline in Science and Engineering Majors Due to Math Being Hard
This May, colleges across the country have reported a continuing decline in the number of science and engineering majors graduating. A recent study by a few of the few remaining…
I Hereby Resign as a Planeeter
Hi, everyone. Heart here. Lately, I've been doing a lot of thinking and I've realized that my time as a planeeter is done. This wasn't an easy decision and it---hey,…
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