Tag: Princeton
Student Accidentally Refers to Princetoween as “Halloween” in Precept, Forced to Drop Class
On Tuesday, Jeremy Briggs ’19 took a fatal misstep during a precept for PSY/GSS 329, Psychology of Gender,…
As Measles Panic Spreads, Witch Hunt Begins
In the wake of the measles outbreak that has plunged Princeton Bay Colony into utter chaos, causing livestock…
Point/Counterpoint: Campus Cyclists Should Ride More Slowly vs. QUAKE, MORTAL
From the Pedestrians Dear Cyclists, We pedestrians realize that you guys are only trying to get around campus…
Eight Signs You Went to Princeton But Have Total Retrograde Amnesia
You ALWAYS tell people you went to “a small liberal arts school in New Jersey” because that’s all…
Humor is Worthless
People say that satire has the power to educate and change and even assert its author’s own opinions.…
Who Is This Man? A Profile of President Eisgruber
Princeton President Christopher Eisgruber opens up about his adventurous past and talks about his journey to the job.
Sorry, We Cannot Offer You a Bid
It’s with sincere regret that I must inform you that we cannot offer you membership into 19 Club,…
Princeton’s Endowment is Huge
“I always saw ads on the internet that promised to make my applicant pool bigger and stronger, and…
Furious Tilghman Unleashes Full Brunt of Weather Machine
Princeton University President Shirley Tilghman, angered for unexplained reasons, has been using her personal weather machine to wreak…
On Having Finals After Break
To having finals after break I'd favor burning at the stake. At least the fire wouldn't take as…
Princeton Approves Orgy on Cannon Green
Less than a week after Harvard officially recognized Harvard College Munch, a student group devoted to kinky sex,…