Tag: Freshman Issue 2015
Spires and Gargoyles — The Best Damn Place of All
A message from the chairman: Welcome to Princeton! Welcome to the Orange Bubble! Welcome to “the best damn place of…
Differences Between UK and American English: A Primer
1. What we in the states call a “stout” or a “lager” will frequently be referred to by people…
Rejected Senior Thesis Topics
• Ancient Aliens: The Origins of Eisgruber • Masturbation and Netflix: An Autobiography • That Secret Nazi Base in Antarctica: Fact…
A Letter from the Chairman and CEO of ExxonMobil
Here at ExxonMobil,  we’re proud of the fact that we have 37 refineries in 21 countries around the world, and as…
Songs the Beach Boys Would Have Sung If They Were A Christian Rock Group
• “Baptized by Breakers” • “Jesus is the Only Surfboard I Need” • “The 11th Commandment: Stay Salty”…
A Father from the 1950’s Trying to Explain Sex to His Son
Lights up on DAD. SON enters. DAD: Gosh, you really razzed my berries sneaking up on me like that.…
Grand Jury Hung on Shoplifter’s Indictment, Grandiose Jury to Intervene
After a Rhode Island Grand Jury was unable to decide whether to indict Peter Hamiss, 22, on charges of shoplifting, the…
Myth vs. Math
Some useful distinctions to help prepare yourself for a math class at Princeton! Myth: You will learn how…
Craigslist: Missed Connections
This is probably a long shot, since I’m not sure how much you remember from last night, but…
America’s Sexiest Currently Tenured Ivy League Presidents
Christina Paxson (Brown University) A young, spry, 55 year-old seductress, Christina Paxson was elected the 19th President of…
Fun Facts Overheard During OA Icebreakers
1. I wrote a 60 page screenplay about an orphan with a pet rat. It’s kinda like Annie but grungier.…
Who is Your Roommate?
When you meet your roommate, it might be tough to see their real personality. Breaking down those natural walls…