- Taking on too many extracurriculars. Everyone tries to do a million things first semester and it’s just not possible! Pick a few clubs you really love and stick to them.
- Messing up your sleep schedule. Seriously guys, eight hours a night is key. You’re not yourself when you’re tired!
- Dismissing the tales of Bartholomew, the lake carnegie dweller. He is real. Horribly, swampily, gorgeously real.
- Ignoring the eerie yet oddly romantic screams echoing down the toe paths each night.
- Following those screams down to Lake Carnegie. There was mist in the air that night, and a strange electricity that I felt pulsing around me as I drew closer to Bartholomew’s lair.
- Where was I? Oh, right.
- Another typical mistake is staying with your high school S.O. Believe me, it never works out. Better to just have a clean break before you leave for college!
- Using Barth as a rebound when you break up with aforementioned S.O. Barth has commitment issues and he’ll . . . well, he’ll leave you as soon as you start to feel a real emotional connection.
- I mean, I honestly thought we had something. Silly, right? Thinking I was the only person in his life. I mean he’s a swamp dweller for god’s sake. Barth can have anyone he wants.
- When he used to wave his slimy horns in his traditional mating dance, I could literally feel sparks flying between us. And it wasn’t just because of the flames he burps when he gets aroused. It was our souls burning for each other.
- Skipping breakfast. Trust me, the energy boost is worth waking up a few minutes earlier.
- It was real for me. I don’t know, it’s just this indescribable pull I feel towards him (or whatever corner of Lake Carnegie he’s feeding in that day). I don’t think I’ve ever experienced anything else like that. I don’t know if I ever will again.
- Please. I miss you Barth. Come back. We don’t need to be like those other couples. We just need to be us.
– RG-W ’21, Illustrated by Z-XK
