The best protection is education–what do you know about sex?
- Having sexual urges doesn’t make you a bad person: only disrespecting the flag makes you a bad person. And also having sex. Having sex makes you a bad person.
- STD’s can be transmitted by kissing, through bodily fluids, or in a FedEx express package sent from your local STD goblins.
- Parents, take note! Here are some common slang words for sex:“Banging”
“Hooking up
“Al Gore-ing”
“Fishing for trout”
“Your first amendment rights“
‘“Listening to the Devil’s spotify playlist”
“Intercourse”
“Global warming”
“Sending the pigs to slaughter”
“Liberal tomfoolery”
“Midnight slurpees”
“Tapdancing on Ronald Reagan’s grave”
- Consent is key! Just remember the acronym C.O.N.S.E.N.T.: Can’t have sex with her until she consents!
Only if she consents!
No sex until you get consent!
Sometimes you don’t want to ask for consent but you should definitely ask for consent!!
Earth is a planet where it’s illegal to not get consent!
Nipples are only to be touched with consent!
Tom is in prison now because he didn’t ask for consent! - Teenagers, before you make a hotheaded decision, remember that sex can feel good, but orgasms feel awful.
- Remember that there’s always Plan B! If the condom breaks, you can just send your bastard child to the circus.
- Regardless of the number of your previous sexual encounters, you are a virgin until you have sex with Mark Wahlberg.
- It’s a myth that most teenagers are sexually active. Actually, all teens are having sex, constantly. There is not a single teen who at this moment is not actively engaged in sex.
- Girls, did you know? There’s actually a smaller, secret vagina hidden inside your main vagina.
- When a man and a woman love each other very much, I am merely reminded of how lonely I am.
- Fun fact! The only 100% effective form of birth control is killing yourself.
- Q: Is sex good?A: No.
-LH ’19 and KZ ’20
