Year: 2010
Law Enforcement Turf Wars
Dear Large Law Enforcement Agency, As an employee of Small Law Enforcement Agency I am very upset by…
Math 215 Exam Leaves Seven Dead, Dozens Failing
“You have 5 days, 11 problems, and 0 chance of success” said Professor Sarnak to his class of…
Presenting: 10 Scurrilous Rumors!
Ann Coulter is afraid of hats, and because of this has never worn one. James Franco once befriended…
A Letter to Julian Assange
Dear Mr. Assange: I'm a 3rd grader from Buffalo, New York and I'm your biggest fan. Your website,…
How To Choose Which Child to Sacrifice
Sometimes, life can throw you a curveball. Worse yet, life can throw a bone-crushing 98 mph fastball directly…
Another Movie-to-book Release? Really?
So I just saw the latest Harry Potter movie, and loved it. But as soon as I left…
The Princeton Badass
Jim got up from the table and left his group of visibly less cool friends behind. He carried…
Things to Do With the Time You Could Be Spending In a Relationship
Ladies, if you have recently been released from the shackles of a loving, fulfilling relationship, you hopefully have…
The Secrets of McCosh, Revealed
The part in italics is taken from Howard Carter's diary- it's how he described what happened when he…
Frederick Douglass: Civil Rights Pioneer or Dangerous Pedophile?
When you learned about Frederick Douglass in your middle school history class, did you think there was something…
Dildo Sale
I can’t wait for the next dildo sale! Normally, I buy about 3-4 new dildos per trip to…