"Winter Issue 2015" tag

Spires and Gargoyles — The Farce Awakens

A message from the chairman: Six hours. That’s the combined runtime of the first three Star Wars movies. Appreciate that number for a moment. Six hours. That’s a bad night’s sleep. That’s a day spent on Facebook…

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Extraterrestrial Contact

  After yet another failed relationship, I knew that I needed to make a change in my life. I determined the solution to my problems: finding someone as far from my usual type…

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Top 25 Space Universities in the Universe

1. 24-Hour Night School 2. Battleschool Scholastica 3. UFO (Univ. of Flying Objects) 4. Deep Space University: Now offering 2.7 degrees! 5. The Derek Zoolander Center for Kids Who Can’t Read Good and Wanna Learn to Do Other…

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Wow: J.J. Abrams Has Already Directed Several Movies, But They’re Still Letting Him Direct Another

A few months ago, J. J. Abrams was confirmed as the director for the upcoming Star Wars film The Force Awakens, the first installment in the franchise’s highly anticipated sequel trilogy. Most fans…

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“The Int’l Space Station: A Layover from Hell”

When I was booking my flight from Boston to Los Angeles, I knew that I’d have to opt for a layover if I wanted a lower price. But after connecting through the International…

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I’m a Rocket-Man

By Elton John I open my eyes to see a room full of scientists, prodding me with their scalpels and their wrenches. I look around – it is a cold, sterile room: an…

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The Martian Is My Life

Dear 20th Century Fox, While most people were entertained or at least somewhat amused while watching your recent release, “The Martian,” I was shocked. How could you call this movie a science fiction…

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Vacation Suggestions for Time Travelers On a Budget

  History is filled with many beautiful and desirable destinations. Yet unfortunately, not everyone has the resources for a trip to Ancient Greece or elaborate futuristic resorts. We can’t all meet William Shakespeare…

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Characters We’d Like to See in the New Star Wars Movie

The Force Awakens would be so awesome if these characters made an appearance! R2-D2 But With Muscles (Jedi) R2-D2 is one of the most recognizable robots in movie history. His squat, rounded frame…

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Things We’d Like to See in a Perfect Parallel Universe

No necks No one has a chin but me. What if, instead of having a regular mouth, like, we had the mouths from the movie Alien, where the alien had a mouth inside…

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