"CSO15" tag

Admissions Officers Admit to Spying After Prospective Students Find University Cameras in their Homes

On Tuesday, March 31, Princeton University released its admissions decisions to regular-decision applicants around the world. However, decision letters aren’t the only thing from admissions now inside students’ homes. In the weeks leading…


“There Is No God”: One Man’s Quest to Win an Amazon Gift Card by Taking Psych Thesis Surveys

Four years. Four years, I have tried. Four years—four years! four years! I have tried. Four years, I have failed! I have tried everything now. My name is on all six res college…


Match.com Customer Care Ticket #42653

Dear Mr. Maxwell, Thank you for reaching out to the Match.com Customer Service Center. We hope this response to your recent complaint clears up all confusion and solves the problems you referenced. As…


How to Decorate Your Sex Dungeon

– CSO ’15.


A Valentine’s Day Sex Overload

SEX OVERLOADS. Everybody knows them. Everybody fears them. You’ll be heading to Late Meal or whatever, you know, just out and about and minding your own business, when— SEX. It comes flying out at you from every nook and cranny…


World-Famous Rock Star Chad Kroeger Falls in Love With Amanda, Age 15, by Amanda, Age 15

It was a bright and not-stormy day, and Chad Kroeger sat by himself in the corner booth of Big Horns Diner, drinking a hot coffee in full view of the Montana sunlight.


How to Lose a Lover in 10 Words

We know you, Princeton student. You hate commitment! You complain about semesters that are only 12 weeks long and can’t even stay in a lecture for a full hour. So if you’re in a relationship…


Things To Do With Your Awkward Arm While Being The Big Spoon

» Snapchat your friends so everyone knows you’re capable of making genuine human connection #cuddling » Finally adjust your clock for Daylight Saving Time » Play a kickin’ piano solo with your jazz trio » Put…


Tiger Admirers Through Time

    – GAW ’16. Illustrated by BAF ’17.


The Street From Hell

Ah, time for a good night out! You’ve pregamed nicely, your friends are going to meet you up ahead, you’ve got passes everywhere. But wait—something’s different about Prospect tonight. Somehow it’s more sinister….

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