Politics

New Education Bill Bans Anything Bad from Happening to Children

Saying it is in “the best interests of the future leaders and innovators of this country”, the House of Representatives today passed the Child Misery Abolition Act, a law which makes illegal any…

Civil War Death Toll Continues to Rise

  The ongoing death toll of the American Civil War continues to rise. Last week, the New York Times reported the death count was up to 750,000, and after a skirmish along the…

Surprising Demographic Behind Putin Protests

Moscow, Russia – Last week, Vladimir Putin was elected president of Russia for the 3rd time. The world’s eyes have been on the former Soviet world capital for the last few months as…

Newt Gingrich Increases List of Things He Promises To Fix That The President Has No Control Over

Pundits and voters were abuzz last week over GOP presidential hopeful Newt Gingrich’s new economic plan, in which he promised $2.50/gallon gasoline if  elected president. This weekend at campaign stops in Georgia and…

Moro Islamic Liberation Front Changes Name to Avoid Confusion with Attractive Middle-Aged Mothers

MANILA – Since its inception in 1981, the Moro Islamic Liberation Front (MILF) has been one of the two main Islamic militant groups in the Philippines, fighting for the independence of the Muslims…

International Pictionary: Nauru Widens the Gap

  As the international battle for Pictionary immortalization rages on, Tiger Magazine is here to bring you the inside scoop on who’s ahead and who’s drawing dead. In the lead: #1 – The…

Restrictions on Greek Life Devastate Greek Economy

Athens, Greece- Though countless Princetonians have complained about the University’s recent decision not to allow students to participate in Greek life until sophomore year, nowhere has the policy had a worse effect than…

Canada and Russia Join Forces to Spread Global Warming

MOSCOW – Canada and Russia, the two former Cold War enemies, have recently found that they have far more shared interests than conflicts. In a joint press conference in the Siberian city of…

Zombie Outbreak Gives Much Needed Direction to Occupy Wall Street Protests

“Brains, braaaaiiiinnns,” says one newly focused protester A recent zombie outbreak in the heart of the New York financial sector has given a new purpose to the Wall Street protests. These protests, also…

Breaking News: D.C. Earthquake Leaves Millions With Homes, Jobs

WASHINGTON D.C. – Millions of people have been left with homes and livelihoods after an earthquake that experts are calling the most mildly disconcerting disaster in decades. The event struck this afternoon at…

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