Gary Johnson Carries New Jersey As Democrats, Republicans Stay Home

Election watchers of all political stripes were stunned Tuesday night as long-shot Libertarian candidate Gary Johnson decisively carried New Jersey, winning 100 percent of the 73 votes cast throughout the state.

Mitt Romney Calls Emergency Meeting of Mitt Romneys

– AJ ’15. Art by CSO ’15.

barack and mitt

Things Least Likely to be Said During the Presidential Debates

A lot of major points will be raised tonight. Here are exactly none of them.


Romney Chooses Barack Obama as Running Mate in Appeal to Independents, African-Americans

In a shocking turn of events, a source with intimate knowledge of the decision tells The Princeton Tiger that Mitt Romney has chosen Barack Obama as his Vice Presidential running mate.


Romney Surges in Israeli Polls After Visit

Presidential hopeful Mitt Romney’s European tour concluded on a high note Tuesday, as a new Rasmussen poll showed the Republican had opened up a 5-point lead over Democratic incumbent Barack Obama in the State of Israel.

New Education Bill Bans Anything Bad from Happening to Children

Saying it is in “the best interests of the future leaders and innovators of this country”, the House of Representatives today passed the Child Misery Abolition Act, a law which makes illegal any…

Civil War Death Toll Continues to Rise

  The ongoing death toll of the American Civil War continues to rise. Last week, the New York Times reported the death count was up to 750,000, and after a skirmish along the…

Surprising Demographic Behind Putin Protests

Moscow, Russia – Last week, Vladimir Putin was elected president of Russia for the 3rd time. The world’s eyes have been on the former Soviet world capital for the last few months as…

Newt Gingrich Increases List of Things He Promises To Fix That The President Has No Control Over

Pundits and voters were abuzz last week over GOP presidential hopeful Newt Gingrich’s new economic plan, in which he promised $2.50/gallon gasoline if  elected president. This weekend at campaign stops in Georgia and…

Moro Islamic Liberation Front Changes Name to Avoid Confusion with Attractive Middle-Aged Mothers

MANILA – Since its inception in 1981, the Moro Islamic Liberation Front (MILF) has been one of the two main Islamic militant groups in the Philippines, fighting for the independence of the Muslims…

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