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How to Be Funny

College is one of the few opportunities you’ll ever get to totally reinvent yourself. No one on campus knows your high school nickname was “Prince Shartsalot” or that you ‘accidentally’ made out with…

A Letter to Eisgruber: Eisgruber’s Response

Yesterday, our Chairman sent this e-mail to President Eisgruber.  Much to our surprise, he soon replied. ——————————————– Dear Timothy, Thank you for these extremely delinquent congratulations.  As you might imagine, Tiger Magazine’s felicitations…

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11 Tips for Awkward Interactions

Stepping onto the sidewalk means facing a world wrought with potential dangers. Oh crap, look, it’s someone you know! You’re supposed to remember their name. Do you say hi first, do you look into their eyes, at their hair, their hands? What’s appropriate these days!? Your ass clenches up in indecision as they approach.

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Excuses For Your Busted Bracket

As the Round of Fleeting Hope slides into the Bittersweet Sixteen, you will need a way to recoup self-esteem and deflect criticism that both of your predicted championship game participants have already exited, and that an Empty Eight is an all-too-real possibility for your once-beautiful bracket. Luckily, The Tiger has your back.

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Space Dating

Are you single? More importantly, are you desperate? Finally, do you want to cross the border between planets and species into a realm of pleasures unknown? Our guide to intergalactic dating will fulfill…

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How 2 Get Laid

Listen. Do you hear that? That’s the sound of a thousand lonely women. That’s the sound of failure. Fortunately, I’m here to turn that frown sound upside down. After pussy-hounding for all thirteen…

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Trojans And Their Condoms

After six years of digging, I’m starting to suspect the ancient Trojans never actually used condoms. Maybe it’s funny to these corporation fat cats to throw around connections like “condoms” and “Troy” that…

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The Surrealist’s Guide to Giving the Perfect Blowjob

A trip and a blowjob. All in one.

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Timeline of Forgetting Her Name

1 minute Wait, she just said it a minute ago. It started with an… S? No, that’s Shakira. I’m thinking of Shakira. 10 minutes Uh oh, we’ve been talking too long for me…

Direct Intercourse With Dick Inman

Dear Dick, My boyfriend is great. We’ve been seeing each other for 2 years now. He’s sweet, thoughtful, and funny, not to mention being fairly “well equipped” downstairs. He takes me out on…

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