Wow: J.J. Abrams Has Already Directed Several Movies, But They’re Still Letting Him Direct Another

A few months ago, J. J. Abrams was confirmed as the director for the upcoming Star Wars film The Force Awakens, the first installment in the franchise’s highly anticipated sequel trilogy. Most fans…


I’m a Rocket-Man

By Elton John I open my eyes to see a room full of scientists, prodding me with their scalpels and their wrenches. I look around – it is a cold, sterile room: an…

Honor Code

I’m Pretty Sure the Honor Code Doesn’t Say Anything About an Honest Mistake Between Two Cousins

  As a Princeton student, I take great pride in my adherence to the University Honor Code. In the past, I’ve looked to “Rights, Rules, Responsibilities” for insights on everything from lab research…


In Defense of Marriage

There is nothing more sacred than the marital bond. And in these increasingly liberal times, there is no more sacred decision than to defend it. Marriage means stability, fidelity, and the reality that…


“There Is No God”: One Man’s Quest to Win an Amazon Gift Card by Taking Psych Thesis Surveys

Four years. Four years, I have tried. Four years—four years! four years! I have tried. Four years, I have failed! I have tried everything now. My name is on all six res college…


In Defense of Bicker: People Are Assholes In The Real World, So I Should Be An Asshole To You Here

By Andy Chesterfield ’16, member of a Bicker club I’m the first to admit that Bicker isn’t perfect, but recent discussion about bicker being “elitist,” “superficial,” and “pointlessly detrimental to campus social life”…

Humor is Worthless

People say that satire has the power to educate and change and even assert its author’s own opinions. They are wrong.


Five Things I Loved About Lincoln

Honest, Abe.


An Open Letter to the Squirrel On Elm Drive (You Know Who You Are)

Dear Squirrel, you probably don’t remember me, considering that you were too busy being a dick. I tried to get by you on the street, but no. You were too busy turning an acorn around in your weird little skeletal paws. Not even eating it or intending to bury it. Just spinning it.


Once Upon A Monday

Mondays are band-aids that take 24 hours to rip off; weekly plagues sent from above to ensure people never have fun for more than six days in a row, unless you’re on vacation, in which case, karma will get you eventually. But if the human race collectively hates Mondays with such passion, why keep them around?

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