What is Barack Obama Going to Do Now?

  • Barack-Obama-Most-Funny-Picture-with-mobile-phone-looking-cool-and-jolly-good-modeTry out bangs
  • Demonstrate exercise equipment in late-night infomercials  
  • Finally let out that fart he’s been holding in for eight years
  • Take an 18-minute nap
  • Force Sarah McLachlan into retirement and sing “In the Arms of An Angel” for the ASPCA
  • Long-overdue snakelike shedding of entire skin
  • Make a paper crane
  • Give Joe the dinner night he deserves
  • Paint the bathroom Halcyon Green from the West Elm collection for Sherwin Williams because it’s very calming and he has plans to rub a dub dub in the tub
  • Indulge in that 8th almond
  • Finally gets to use his own private email account: bbbbarackandroll69@hotmail.com
  • Travels on horseback to the Wyoming mountains with Joe Biden: Barackback Mountain
  • Get as high as his approval ratings
  • Finally work up the courage to ask why he won the Nobel Peace Prize in the first place
  • Write mystery novels starring a plucky United States President down on his luck
  • Remove his Obama mask to reveal that he, too, is Joe Biden
  • Return the Chicago Public Library’s copy of The Presidency For Dummies
  • Go door-to-door to berate each and every American citizen for the disgusting contents of their internet history
  • Michelle

-Staff

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