In Defense of Bicker: People Are Assholes In The Real World, So I Should Be An Asshole To You Here

By Andy Chesterfield ’16, member of a Bicker club

I’m the first to admit that Bicker isn’t perfect, but recent discussion about bicker being “elitist,” “superficial,” and “pointlessly detrimental to campus social life” has totally missed the point of it all. The beauty of Bicker lies in how it prepares us for the real world. Out there, people are assholes, so why shouldn’t we be assholes here, too?

Look, I know Bicker critics don’t like to think of the world outside the Orange Bubble, but the truth is that in the real world, people are going to judge you based on superficial things like how an introductory conversation goes or how you look on a random January day. Why should Princeton hold itself to a different standard? If you ask me, that’s being elitist.

Some people think that Bicker dehumanizes those who participate, forcing them to pretend to be someone they’re not and putting them through degrading tasks, which they undertake solely because they believe it will help them gain the group’s approval.

Yeah, it’s pretty much like that. But isn’t real life? Ever been through the hiring process for a consulting firm? It’s basically the same thing. Exclusivity and elitism exist almost everywhere in some form or another, and it is therefore right that they be propagated without being questioned at Princeton.

Maybe that’s harsh, but that’s how it is. And look, I’d love to be able to tone down the negative aspects of Bicker, making it a less intimidating and less humiliating process. But how would we go about doing that? Bicker has existed for over a century, and other than Charter, Cloister, Colonial, Quad, Terrace, and all those people who go independent, nobody has figured out a better way of doing things.

SBW ’15

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