Heated Marijuana Debate Continues

Illustrated by KX ’16

Heated debate regarding the legalization of marijuana has reached a boiling point across the Internet, with thousands of users all vigorously spouting the exact same opinion.

An exhaustive investigative report has confirmed that across five message boards, 25 YouTube videos, and 16 Facebook pages, no less than 2481 people have come out in support of marijuana legalization, while nobody has argued against it.

Commenting on 420 Magazine’s online forum, New York resident Derrick Langley zealously defended his liberal views on marijuana against absolutely no one who disagreed with him.

“Pot isn’t addictive, and medical marijuana has all these benefits too,” wrote Langley, who declared that he wouldn’t stop until everyone on the website, whose membership consists almost exclusively of males aged 15-26, knows the truth about cannabis.

“Moar ppl die from drukn driving den from smokin pot,” contended user W3edwizard97 in a YouTube comment that received 11 thumbs up, to which detractors did not respond because they were not watching Snoop Lion music videos at 2:31 am on a Sunday.

Tensions reached a fever pitch when Texas resident Claudia Davey almost rebutted Washington resident Trevor Pinto’s Facebook post pointing out the lack of conclusive evidence on whether marijuana is a gateway drug. In the end, Davey did not respond to the comment because she is not a member of “Legal Marijuana for US,” the group where it was posted.

At press time, Pinto, who lists April 20th as his birthday on Facebook, had received 21 likes and 13 aggressively supportive replies for his post.

The wildfire of contention has also reportedly spread beyond the Internet.

“What people don’t get is that no one gets hurt by weed,” Eliot Hughes said to his friend, Austin Graham, while both sat in an abandoned dugout in Wallingford, CT at 3:46 am. Sources confirm that Graham did not respond due to being blazed out of his mind.

– EYY ’17

You May Also Like