LikeaLittle Posts that Made Me Swoon

9:23 pm- At Dillon: Female, Blonde

I am a hideous wretch who has no hope at improving my physique. You are a very hot and fit female person who is well out of my league, and you really don’t need to demoralize me the few times I’m there. Please don’t; and I might like you a little more.

8:29 pm- At Frist: Female, No Hair

I want to ens-NAIR myself in your head. If you don’t know what I mean, it just means I want to get in your pants.

7:12- At Rocky private dining room: Female, brown hair

When I said you were ‘pleasurably attractive,’ I meant it in a fatherly/poetic way. Didn’t want to cause any confusion. Do buy my latest book.

7:12- At the Rocky private dining room: Male, black hair

I thought there was a discussion on the precipitous decline of the cosmetics industry but there was no one there. When you walked in, I instantly recognized you as Cornel West and I agreed with your ‘observations.’ What can I do now to get in your freshman seminar?

4:35- At MOL class: Female, brown hair

You look like a sweet lady up there with those gorgeous bonnets; I would cuddle with you on a plush leather sofa anytime, boo..quit lecturing and running this place, so I could start running YOU. done.

2:48 pm- At Princeton: Male, Brown hair

You always wink at me with both of your eyes at the same time every now and then. I think it’s cute. Let’s make this happen.

1:20 pm- At Alcoholics Anonymous: Male, Thinning hair

I can’t stop thinking about how sexy you look when you chug your beer. I wouldn’t mind chugging your ‘beer’ sometime…but I would rather be chugging your beer, to be frank.

12:00 am/pm- At my bedroom: Female, Brown Hair

You’re lying on top of me, facing me, but I can’t decide if you’re my friend or my inner Hyde made manifest. Take a stab at clarifying it, or just take a stab period. Yours, Natalie.

3 am- At Terrace: Questionable, Purple Hair

I like what you did with yourself there. But I wish you asked me to Small World instead of just trying to do so in semaphore..Hey, did you get to see Ozzy Osbourne at TI? Let’s talk about it sometime…

2:10 am- At TI first: Male, Long black mane

You took me to your dorm and fucked me terribly well. Then you told me you love me with the strength of a Spartan army and promptly left. I still have yet to hear you though- talk to me sometime?

11:58 pm- At East Pyne: Female, red hair.

I pyne. For you. <- Classic(s)?