J. Crew Pleased With Diversity Efforts

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According to sources in the company, J. Crew’s management is positively tickled pink by the success of Princeton’s diversity efforts. Relaxing in back of the Ivy Club during lawnparties on September 23, Senior Brand Enhancer Wexford A. S. Peabody enthused, “My, but this is great! It does expand our market reach so!” With a 37.2% “minority rate” (7.9 on the Jesse Jackson Rainbow scale), the class of 2011 is the most racially diverse the college has seen. “I greatly appreciate President Tilghman’s efforts,” Peabody bubbled. “She has brought together white people, Asian people, Hispanic people, and African American people, so they can all dress like rich, white folks together. It’s better than a Benetton ad.” Companies like J. Crew that market the “preppy” look have reported a jump in sales corresponding to the increased diversity in Ivy League institutions, as new graduates bring the look back to their home communities. Dean of Admissions Janet Rapeleye would not comment on the University’s collaboration with either J. Crew or Ralph Lauren. However, sources inside FUBU tell us their board is exerting pressure on historically black Tuskeegee University to start admitting more white people.

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