How to Make Fun of Jian Li and Not Offend Billions of Asians (Really, Billions)

asiaWe’re taught to ignore differences and assume everyone is equal… or acknowledge differences and celebrate them but everyone is equal… or is it that you can make fun of a race if you’re part of it…or not the Holocaust but the Russian gulag…or it’s women who you can talk about but not the handicapped, unless they are in the room. Damn, we’re already confused. Let’s just make this as uncomplicated as possible: no racial jokes of any type, if that race/category/sex is in the room. Satisfied?

Of course, they don’t have to be in the room for them to hear it. Someone could have a cell phone camera and your beloved legacy as the goofy neighbor could then be equated with a racist, cruel, and completely unfunny rant, or if you like, print it in a daily Princetonian newspaper and run it on your website.

The Prince, clearly a newcomer to the humor, failed to recognize how upset people get when you make fun of their skin color and then sterotype them because of it. If you have yet to hear about this fiasco: in its annual joke issue, The Prince made fun of Jian Li, a fucktard Yalie who just happens to be Asian. Then they stood behind it because Asians helped write it. It’s not okay, by the way, to say, “Two of X group wrote it, too,” because those people aren’t ambassadors of their race/color/creed. Unless they are the good ones.

Finally, Prince Editor-in-Chief Sethi said in an interview in The New York Times that they used racist language in order to “strangle” it. Whatever, jerk. Language is strangled not by voicing it, but by not breathing life into it, you self-righteous ass. No one says “two bits” anymore because people stopped saying it, not because it was the subject of too many satirical articles.

So Tiger is going to school the Prince in how to make fun of Jian Li. Just so we’re clear, we will not use these following words:

Oriental

Child of Genghis

Mongoloid

Yellow Peril

Asiatic

Nip

And here we go:

JIAN LI WAS A FUCKTARD WHO GOT REJECTED FROM PENN.

Did you see how easy that was? And no one got hurt, except for Jian Li (and any fucktards out there who are fucktarded enough to admit that they are fucktards).

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